The wedding industry has been under fire lately. Many people are blasting wedding vendors and the wedding industry in general about how pricing is so expensive. While most vendors are honest, hardworking businesses, there are some out there who price gauge. There’s no denying that. But honestly (and this may hurt) a business offering a luxury service can charge whatever they want. It’s either within your budget, or it’s not. Both are 100% okay. Every wedding vendor cannot fit every budget, and all budgets are different.

To say it plainly: Getting married is free (minus the courthouse paperwork.) Having a wedding is not.

You can go to the courthouse tomorrow, sign a marriage license, and be just as legally married as the couple who spent $250K at a country club. Or $20K for an intimate, inclusive, customized backyard wedding. Marriage is the commitment. The wedding? That’s the show. The celebration, the photos, the candlelight, the flowers, the gown, the curated playlist, the grazing table, the signature cocktails, the string lights and champagne toasts. That’s not marriage. That’s a luxury experience you are choosing to have… and to spend money on.

Weddings Are Extra (And That’s Not a Bad Thing!)

Somewhere along the way, we started treating weddings like a default life event, something everyone should get, no matter the cost or effort required to create it. But the truth is: weddings are a luxury. A beautiful one, a meaningful one, but still… a luxury. They are not required for marriage. They are not guaranteed by adulthood. They are not a birthright. They are a chosen celebration, one that takes real time, talent, materials, and money to bring to life.

That doesn’t mean your wedding has to cost six figures. But it does mean it will cost something. Because what you’re asking for isn’t “just a venue” or “just some flowers.” You’re asking for an immersive experience, something curated, styled, and orchestrated with precision. You’re asking professionals to design your dream, anticipate your needs, light your candles, arrange your blooms, capture your story, feed your guests, set the table to your vision, cue the music, sweep the floor, and disappear before the clock strikes midnight so it all looks effortless. There is so much that happens behind the scenes that you have no idea about. But that’s the point. That’s just part of what you’re paying for, what you’re investing in. Trusting your vendors to do the work you hired them to do, they want you want it done.

That’s not just “extra.” That’s extraordinary. And it takes real humans with real skills to make that magic happen.

You’re not paying to stand on someone’s lawn. You’re paying for vision, for atmosphere, for the kind of beauty that doesn’t just show up. You hire it, you plan it, and you pay for it. That’s not a scam. That’s the cost of choosing something elevated. Something beyond the courthouse. Something that lives in your memory forever.

And if you can’t or don’t want to invest in all of that? That’s okay. Love doesn’t need a chandelier. But if you do want it, honor it for what it is: a luxury experience. One worth saving for, planning around, and valuing deeply.

You’re Not Owed a Wedding.

Ouch. This may sound harsh, but it’s true. You’re not entitled to a wedding. As human beings, there are shared experiences within our human lifetime that many experience. Your family. Your friend group. Birth of a child. A wedding is also one of them and we wish everyone could have that experience! But it’s not given. We’re not entitled to it.

That’s not to say you don’t deserve to be celebrated. You absolutely do! But if your budget doesn’t align with the venue, vendors, or vision you have in mind, the answer isn’t to shame those businesses. It’s to rethink what’s most important to you. For example, if being on the water is the most important thing to me, I’m not going to publicly shame yacht businesses because I can’t afford a yacht. I’m going to research, budget, save and invest in a boat that will get me on the water… because that’s what most important. The water. Same with a wedding. I’m not going to shame wedding venues who charge $20,000 for 4 walls because that’s not in my budget. People pay that! Because those 4 walls are important to them. Their choice. Maybe a backyard greenhouse surrounded and decorated by nature is what’s important to you? Now that’s worth the investment!

When you chose to have a wedding, you are choosing to spend money. Because in the wedding industry, they’re work. They’re beauty. They’re coordination, infrastructure, insurance, staffing, experience, and value. If you want the premium version, you need to expect a premium investment. No one is forcing you to put on a show with a wedding. It’s a choice. If you don’t want to spend that money… don’t!

The Courthouse Is Always an Option.

Let’s normalize this: You can go to the courthouse and still be wildly in love. And have a beautiful ceremony! Still be valid. Still be worthy. If you can’t afford your dream wedding now, that doesn’t mean you can’t have it someday. What’s important is the marriage. The union. The wedding can come later, if that’s something you want to have.

But we have to stop acting like a wedding vendor is the villain because they charge what their service is worth. We have to stop treating luxuries and optional life experiences like birthrights. And we have to be honest with ourselves about what we can afford, what we actually value, and what marriage means to us.

No Shame. (Ever.) Just Truth.

At Vaughan House, we don’t apologize for being a premium micro-wedding experience. We’re not for everyone. And that’s okay. But for the couples who book with us, we pour our whole hearts into creating something unforgettable, uniquely custom to them, at a location you will not find anywhere else.

If you want to get married, do it. If you want a wedding… choose it, plan for it, invest in it. It’s unfair to demand champagne dreams on a water budget and expect someone else to pick up the difference because you believe you’re entitled to it. And when those vendors value their service and stand behind their pricing that was build from years of experience, don’t publicly bash them on social media, crying that the wedding industry is a scam. The wedding industry isn’t a scam. It’s an ecosystem of artists, planners, designers, florists, photographers, videographers, chefs, stylists, and venue owners who pour thousands of hours into creating one unforgettable day (or weekend!) for people they’ve never met. It’s not inflated pricing… it’s the cost of labor, experience, licensing, rentals, liability, and creativity on a service that is a luxury. All coming together under pressure with no do-overs. Just because it’s emotional doesn’t mean it’s exploitative. Weddings are valuable because they honor something rare – two people making a lifelong promise in a way that feels sacred, beautiful, and uniquely theirs. That’s not a scam. That’s craftsmanship.

Weddings are extra. That’s what makes them special.

And the truth? You don’t need a wedding to get married. But if you want one, make it count and respect the investment needed to make it happen. Because the vendors you chose to hire certainly do!